Monday, August 1, 2011

Cinema Solo

It’s official: We are in San Diego.

What can I say about last week? Moving is brutal. Handsome K was down here the whole week as he started his job a month ago, so I had the awesome task of packing up the entire apartment by myself.

Ok, ok, Moe was there too, but his lack of opposable thumbs hindered his ability to help greatly. He got some good naps in, though.

The apartment was all sorts of depressing what with the boxes and the bits and pieces that start to collect all over the place even when you feel like you’re making progress. I felt at any moment A&E was going to show up to film an episode of Hoarders (minus the rotting trash and dead cats, thankfully). 
So how did I keep myself from going mad? With Instant-watch movies on Netflix, of course!

Why watch movies online, you ask? Oh, simply because we don’t own a T.V. (yes, we are one of those annoying couples…).

I had a discussion with my friend Ariana about this and we’re both in agreement: Netflix’s online movies, however convenient, lead to some random choices. They don’t offer many of the newly released films you’d actually want to see, i.e. the ones you’re willing to spend $4 on at a store. Netflix Instant Watch does, however, provide a plethora of 80’s cult, C+ horror and unknown foreign hits (I'm using the  word "hits" loosely).

Thus, I felt it only fair that I relive some of my favorites from last week.

The Crazies
Who doesn’t love a good old-fashioned government-made-virus-infects-a-po-dunk-town-of-people-causing-some-to-go-crazy-and-others-to-become-homicidal-maniacs kind of movie? I wish it had a better title, because I probably would have enjoyed it sooner than I’m Moving and Will Watch Anything Week had I known it wasn’t half bad. Also, I don’t know what it is about being alone in my apartment and watching obscure horror films, but it happens all the time and I’ve come to realize it’s a horrible habit.

The Hole
Calm it with the snickering, everyone. Bad title, I know. I’m a bit surprised this movie wasn’t even mentioned in the U.S. when it came out, but after reading some Netflix comments (whose spelling mistakes alone provide entertainment), it seems it may have had to do with Keira Knightley’s burgeoning career and Disney’s desire to keep her exposed chest under wrap. I loved the premise of this movie and it was entertaining enough, but if gruesome isn’t your cup of tea, you probably don’t want to watch this.

The Fly
If you haven't seen this sci-fi bit of horror, you are missing out. Jeff Goldblum is a scientist (I guess?) who creates two pods that allow for teleportation. Unfortunately for him (and his girlfriend, Geena Davis), he gets drunk one night and decides to teleport, not realizing he's been genetically mutated with a fly who crept into the pod. Again, major ick factor with this one if you're squeamish (don't even get me started on his ear/jaw/eating issues).

The Frog Prince
Ahhhhh! Some light in the dark and don't you just love the German image for it? It was the only one I could find! Starring Aileen Quinn of Annie fame, this was one of my favorite movies when I was a kid. I’ve been searching for it for years on video, then DVD, and lo and behold it was a suggestion Netflix made for me. Sometimes, things are meant to be. If you were a fan of any made-for-television fairy tales in the 80’s, get excited…  

The River Wild
White water rafting? Check. The pale, redheaded boy from Radio Flyer and Jurassic Park? Check. Murderous Kevin Bacon? Check. Dog tricks? Check. This movie has it all and reminds me of why action/adventure thrillers from the 90’s surpass all other decades’.

Mother's Boys
Jamie Lee Curtis acts as a crazy, jealous blonde who ditches her family and then comes back years later expecting everything to go back to the way it was before she left. Peter Gallagher and his black caterpillar eyebrows play her jilted husband and Joanne Whalley (yes, Xortia from Willow!) is the new girlfriend who gets J.L.’s goat. I don’t know what it is about melodramatic thrillers that revolve around a plethora of unanswered questions (Why is the boy so easily manipulated? How does she have enough money to afford an expensive high rise in New York City? Why did the producers think Curtis would be believable as a blonde?!), but I am drawn to them like flies on honey. 

Overall, I have to give thanks to all the films I watched last week, because without them (the good, the bad, the Jamie Lee Curtis’), I may never have moved, but remained a babbling mess in a sea of boxes in an apartment in LA that was no longer mine.

Merci beaucoup, Netflix Instant-Watch.

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